EMDR with Kids — What it Looks Like
Child EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) is adapted to meet kids where they are developmentally—so it’s more playful, relational, and flexible than adult EMDR, while still following the eight phase AIP model of EMDR.
Here’s what it actually looks like in practice:
1. Safety and Relationship Come First
Before any trauma processing, the therapist focuses on helping the child feel safe, connected, and understood.
Building trust through play, drawing, or conversation
Helping the child identify feelings and body sensations
Creating “safe/calm” imagery (often with imagination or storytelling)
The relationship is the foundation of the work.
2. Understanding the Child’s World
Instead of a formal history like with adults, therapists gather information through:
Play themes
Caregiver input
Behavior patterns
Drawings or stories
Sand Tray Work
This helps identify what experiences may be “stuck” in the child’s nervous system.
3. Resourcing (Building Internal Tools)
Kids are taught skills in a way that feels natural and engaging:
“Calm place” or “brave place” visualizations
Stuffed animals or characters as helpers
Breathing games or movement
Externalizing worries (e.g., putting them in a “container”)
These become anchors during processing.
4. Processing — Through Play and Imagination
This is where EMDR differs most from adult work.
Instead of talking through trauma in detail, children might:
Draw the memory
Tell it like a story or movie
Use toys, sand tray, or characters
Focus on a feeling or body sensation
Bilateral stimulation (BLS) is still used, but adapted:
Tapping (on hands, knees, or with “tappers”)
Butterfly hugs
Light bars or following a toy with their eyes
Rhythm (drumming, bouncing a ball)
The child processes in short, tolerable sets.
5. Integration (Making Sense of It)
As the memory becomes less distressing, the therapist helps the child:
Notice new feelings (“I’m safe now”)
Build positive beliefs (“It wasn’t my fault”)
Strengthen confidence and resilience
This often happens naturally through play rather than formal discussion.
6. Caregiver Involvement
Caregivers are often part of the process:
Learning how to support regulation at home
Reinforcing skills between sessions
Sometimes participating directly in sessions (especially for younger kids)
What Makes Child EMDR Unique
Less verbal, more experiential
Moves at the child’s pace
Uses play and symbolism as the language of processing
Prioritizes attachment and co-regulation
In your language (Safe Harbor lens)
Child EMDR is less about asking a child to revisit the storm—and more about sitting beside them, helping their nervous system realize the storm has already passed.
Through connection, rhythm, and imagination, the body gets to release what it couldn’t before.
